if i wrote my professional bio like a dude

based on real-life events

In a world of fleeting trends, I find solace in the classics: a perfectly chilled cosmo and the satisfying tap-tap-tap of my Mahnolos.

It's that dedication to originality and attention to detail that makes my content stand out.

While I didn't literally slay dragons at Princeton, I did conquer the arts of storytelling and writing. Think 'Legally Blonde' meets 'Mean Girls,' but with less pink and more Microsoft Word. My background in critical studies and a passion for writing that would make even Shakespeare jealous have led me to create content for some pretty big names. I can’t specifically name anyone, but think the guys behind The Godfather, E.T., and Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels. It’s been an amazing ride.

I’ve helped companies of all shapes and sizes, from tiny startups to giant corporations. Think of me as your content fairy godmother, but instead of a wand, I wield a laptop and an Ivy League vocabulary (and IL connections). Whether you need blog posts that will break the internet, website copy more captivating than Ryan Gosling’s eyes, or a comprehensive content strategy that's worthy of a standing ovation, if you hire me, I guarantee your competitors will cry.

Ready to ditch the boring content and embrace something fabulous? Hit me up! (And let's celebrate with a cosmo.)